06-20-2004 - 10:02 p.m.
Today is the 4th day of my summer vacation and so far it is sucking big fat donkey dick.
The last day of school was surprisingly sad and depressing. The past month I've been itching for a break and suddenly the day was upon me and I didn't want it to end. This was actually somewhat comforting because it made me realize that I've definitely chosen the right profession for myself. But overall, it was depressing. Basically, I feel like my job is about the only thing I'm good at these days, and without it who/what the fuck am I??? I feel like the most useless human being on the planet because the one meaningful thing in my life is temporarily on hold for 2 months.
So, all I've been wanting to do is get totally trashed since I left work on Thursday. But Thursday night my friend backed out on me last minute because she didn't feel like drinking, and instead wanted to go get ice cream. Okay, first off if I'm gonna go on a frivolous calorie fest I want it to be with beer so that I'm at least feeling good at the end of it all. Secondly, I will totally go out for ice cream if they're serving it with a shot of Jack Daniels on the side. (However, I figured they weren't so I didn't go.)
Friday night- she was toooooooooooooooooo tired to go out. Oh suck it up!
Saturday- Father's Day Fest w/ the fam in Pennsylvania, a few margaritas, but since I was driving no chance to get smashed.
Today- a few beers at happy hour and the freaking biggest "rum with a splash of Coke" with dinner, but still haven't accomplished that "completely obliterated" mind frame I'm looking for. God, I miss college. Why is it so freaking difficult to find someone to get drunk with???
And doctors just totally suck. I've been getting sick on and off for over a year now and after waiting a week and a half for lab results they finally told me in an annoyingly chipper voice that "All labs are normal!!! You're fine dear!" If I'm "fine" then why the fuck do I feel like I'm about to give birth to an alien baby every day of my life??? So, tomorrow morning it's back to square one, back to the doctors, back to his never ending guessing game. That's really all medicine is anyways.
This summer officially BLOWS!
